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According to 2014 data compiled by the Williams Institute, 31% of married same-sex female couples have a 5- to 10-year age difference, compared to 21% of married different-sex couples; for 10-plus years, those numbers are 16% and 8%, respectively. While naysayers insist that relationships like Holland Taylor and Sarah Paulson’s don't make them uncomfortable for an explicitly gay reason, significant age differences between lesbians aren’t actually divorced from their queerness at all — these differences are a nontraditional aspect of coupledom borne from queerness itself.
Women who date significantly up or significantly down radically subvert heteronormative standards for what’s appropriate when it comes to sex and love.
Misunderstandings with warped oedipal undertones often plague queer women in intergenerational relationships.
Once, the author and poet Eileen Myles was checking out at a store with a younger woman she was dating at the time, when the cashier asked her, “How are you doing today, Mom?
The epigram which opens Grandma, Paul Weitz’s 2015 film about a gay woman in her sixties and her teenage granddaughter, is a quote from Myles: “Time passes.
That’s for sure.” Myles is clearly a model upon which Weitz crafted his titular character, played with some serious panache by Lily Tomlin: She’s a lapsed academic; she’s a poet; and she’s dating a younger woman, played by 40-year-old Judy Greer.
But there are also plenty of people who are uncomfortable with Taylor and Paulson’s 32-year age difference.
One of the most-liked Facebook comments on the article reads: “This is really gross.
My colleague Sarah Karlan recently rounded up the sweetest tweets exchanged between the newly public couple.
Not because they are gay, but because Sarah Paulson is dating the crypt keeper.” Depictions of significant lesbian age differences were mostly the stuff of subculture before this year, when a number of films pushed the phenomenon into the mainstream spotlight.